Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part B.S.. Repellent and dispense from a protected location. "Fish Story” Strength: Combine two parts B.S. Repellent with one part water and spray with protective "fog" pattern. "Total Whopper Strength": Use undiluted B.S.. Repellent and spray the B.S. er. Consider "misting" yourself prior to anticipated contact with the B.S.er so no B.S. can stick to you.

Warning!!! Laboratory tests of this product have demonstrated that its' use may result in a shrill response from the recipient. (Loss of Bladder Control is Possible!!!!) The Lord's name is often used. This product is known to cause loud voices and rectal discomfort.

Note: For best results consider added patience with the subject. Communicate that he or she is loved because of who they are and not how much they impress anyone. Few people believe their stories anyway. Affirm, hold the person accountable, and reaffirm.

INGREDIENTS: Truth Detector #171, 475 mg genuine B.S.. extract, all natural flavors, ego deflator with energizer, humble pie, humility, full serving of crow and insecurity neutralizer.

"Joan Rivers" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Bad Joke Repellent and apply to joke or joke teller. "Andrew Dice Clay" Strength: Combine two parts Bad Joke Repellent with one part cold water and spray copious amounts. "Red Fox" Strength: Mix undiluted Bad Joke Repellent with two table spoons of Dumb Ass Repellent and apply repeatedly to the would be joke teller until desired results are achieved.

Warning: Application of Bad Joke Repellent may cause some to question their comedy ability. FINALLY!

Note: Bad Joke Repellent works best by applying the product to the producer of all bad jokes, tasteless remarks and fouled up stories. For best results apply product from multiple people. Always be careful to protect the art of comedy.

INGREDIENTS: Poor Taste Neutralizer, Seinfeld Extract, Images of Amos and Andy, 450 mg of Cosby, Comedy Understanding, Timing, Discernment, and Motivation to Stop While Ahead.

"Hack" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Bogey Repellent and apply to the golfer and each club in the bag. "Par Saver" Strength: Combine two parts Bogey Repellent with one part cold water and spray fog mist that engulfs the entire golfer. "Tour" Strength: Mix undiluted Bogey Repellent with Wake Up Energizer and spray copious amounts of Bogey Repellent to the club, the golfer and to the ball itself. Repeat process as needed.

Warning: This product has been known to compel avid golfers to crave plaid pants and white patent leather belts. Use minimal amounts of Bogey Repellent initially. If user of Bogey Repellent begins to crave polyester and disco music then contact the necessary health care professionals.

Note: For best results, relax and concentrate on the task at hand. Picture the desired result in your mind and focus in a manner that all outside distractions are removed. Swing smoothly and allow the club head to do the work.

INGREDIENTS: Par Protection # 34, Shank Remover, Out of Bounds Dissolver with Bioflavens, Duffer Deterrent Accelerator, Chile Dip Deflector Extract and Concentration Compounder #50.

"Rumsfeld" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Conservative Repellent and apply to the conservative. "Cheney" Strength: Combine two parts Conservative Repellent with one part cold water and spray fog mist that engulfs the entire conservative. "Mega Bush" Strength: Mix undiluted Conservative Repellent with Dumb Ass Repellent and spray copious amounts of Conservative Repellent on the neocon. Repeat process as needed.

Warning: This product may cause extreme irritation to conservatives, neocons and right wing evangelists. The dispenser of this product may be labeled left wing, feminine zealot, liberal and socialist.

Note: Laboratory tests have shown when product is applied directly to the skin of a conservative the subject is likely to respond with loud shrills, shrieks, contorted facial gestures, and rectal discomfort. Follow directions and apply as needed.

INGREDIENTS: Education #101, Common Sense Accelerator, Stupidity Dissolver, 450 m of Speech Enhancer, Grammar Primero, Oxygen, Cheney Blocker and Geopolitical Understanding.

Regular Strength: mix one part water with equal parts, truth, facts and principles. "Pelosi" Strength: combine above mixture with references to God and rights of the unborn. For maximum effect use "Kennedy" Strength: Mix straight truth with facts and constitutional rights that highlight the Founding Fathers' reliance on God. For full effect apply product generously to all arguments involving liberals. For best results spray product directly on the liberal or mix with bath water. In case of filibuster apply product until desired results are reached.

WARNING!!!! This product may cause extreme irritation to liberals, media and academic elites. User of the product is likely to be labeled extremist, bigot, warmonger, homophobe, right wing, idiot and zealot.

Note: Laboratory tests have shown when product applied directly to the skin of a liberal the subject is likely to respond with loud shrills, shrieks, contorted facial gestures and rectal discomfort. Follow directions and apply as needed.

INGREDIENTS: Truth, Virtue, Common Sense, Facts, Constitution, Reagan Extract, Biblical Principles, Strength, Integrity, Knowledge, Defense of the Unborn, Low Taxes, and God.

Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part Dumb Ass Repellent and spray in the direction of any needy Dumb Ass or Dumb Ass Idea. "Bozo" Strength: Combine two parts Dumb Ass Repellent with one part cold water and spray the Dumb Ass. "Lobotomy" Strength: Mix undiluted Dumb Ass Repellent with any argument containing common sense and truth. Follow up with Dumb Ass Repellent mixed in bath or shower water.

WARNING!!!! Use of Dumb Ass Repellent may result in blank stares and looks of bewilderment followed by classic excuses such as "What!", "Who Me?", "I didn't Know", "Are You Sure?", "No One Told Me" and "Is That A Problem?". Prolonged use may result in loss of rectal control within the Dumb Ass.

Note: Consider helping the Dumb Ass out of his or her predicament with patience, forgiveness, assistance, clarity and instruction.

INGREDIENTS: I.Q, Extract, Common Sense Multiplier, Experience, Knowledge, Moment of Understanding, Disbelief, Temporary Clarity in Stupidity, Screwed Sensation and Refusal to Be Undermined by a Dumb Ass.

Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part Filth Repellent and spray stream at source of filthy content. (Avoid Spraying Objects That Use Electricity) "Profanity" Strength: Combine two parts Filth Repellent with one part cold water and spray the source of filth. "Porn" Strength: Mix undiluted Filth Repellent with a stern look and explanation that the content being read, viewed or heard is harmful the user and those around the user.

Warning: Filthy content and material will often be defended as free speech, open mindedness, comedy, pushing the envelope, progressive and genius. User of Filth Repellent may be labeled close minded, old fashioned, right wing, and judgmental.

Note: Explain that because something may be legal does no mean it is good. Something can be natural yet harmful - such as cancer. The opportunity for something much better is available. Living at the lowest common denominator of life is void of joy.

INGREDIENTS: Higher Standards Enhancer, Trash Warning Extract, Convictions, Discernment of Poor Taste, Goodness Seeking Bioflavens, Filth Repellent Accelerator, Temptation Repellent and Garbage Dissolver.

Regular Strength: For best results apply Horny Husband Repellent directly to the "extended" area. Straight stream is recommended for initial application. "Bay Watch" Strength: Mix ice with mixture of Horny Husband Repellent and speak in tones that emulate Rosanne Barr while applying the product. Effectiveness may be further enhanced by applying product while wearing full one piece, fleece pajamas with built-in feet.

WARNING!!!! Laboratory tests have shown horny husbands may exhibit amazing agility and speed trying to evade Horny Husband Repellent. Apply in areas void of slippery floors and sharp objects so as not to cause injury to your horny husband.

Note: Horny Husband Repellent extinguishes feelings of arousal only until the next impulse begins. Therefore, apply Horny Husband Repellent every six seconds or until "affected" area is saturated.

INGREDIENTS: cold water, thoughts of baseball, shopping extract, shrinkage solution #9, visions of large women in thongs, and images of being threatened by masculine females with facial hair.

Regular Strength: spray gentle mist of Horny Husband Repellent Neutralizer prior to anticipated use of Horny Husband Repellent. "Fun Loving" Strength: Combine Horny Husband Repellent Neutralizer with a clean house and greet her at the door with a gentle hug and kiss. "Getting Some" Strength: Join Horny Husband Repellent Neutralizer to a clean house, soft music and a warm bath topped with rose petals. Nice dinner is recommended. Consider sending flowers early in the day.

WARNING!!!! Prolonged use of Horny Husband Repellent Neutralizer may cause significant improvement to a marriage and love life. Laboratory tests have resulted in increase intimacy and lowered levels of conflict.

Note: Horny Husband Neutralizer is designed to work proactively by altering the environment of the dispenser of Horny Husband Repellent.

INGREDIENTS: 69 feelings of passion, natural herbs, thoughts of romance, desire to rekindle love life, 200 milligrams of compassion, purified consideration, and willingness to watch sappy movies and chick flicks instead of news and sports center.

"Spineless Republican" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Illegal Immigration Repellent and apply “fog mist” to the affected area of the border. "Liberal Democrat" Strength: Combine two parts Illegal Immigration Repellent with one part cold water and spray potential problem areas. "Kennedy" Strength: Do your country a favor and dump out Illegal Immigration Repellent then fill bottle with Dumb Ass Repellent and spray yourself until soaked. Apply to like-minded friends as needed.

Warning: Laboratory tests have shown this product to have no effect on preventing illegal immigration. Like other liberal efforts this product produces feelings of compassion and superiority among the elite. Illegal Immigration Repellent is also effective when mixed with bath water.

Note: Illegal Immigration Repellent is designed to establish a protective barrier along the border and establish a "green belt zone" where people of both nations can embrace and freely exchange amnesty for tortillas.

INGREDIENTS: Border Dissolver #23, Liberal Extract, Feelings of Superiority, Buying millions of voters at our expense - Priceless!

Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part Lazy Ass Repellent and spray any sitting or prone Lazy Ass who should be working. "Sleep In" Strength: Combine two parts Lazy Ass Repellent with one part cold water and spray the Lazy Ass. "Get to Work" Strength: Mix undiluted Lazy Ass Repellent with the threat of being fired. Lazy Ass Repellent is perfect for individuals, sitting or prone, or groups of employees, students and kids.

WARNING!!!! Application of Lazy Ass Repellent to any Lazy Ass may result in loud shrills, screams and shouts of four letter words. Looks of shock and panic may transform into fits of rage. Consider combining Lazy Ass Repellent with Mooch Repellent for improved results.

Note: Consider establishing well defined expectations and employing a "carrot and stick" strategy. Provide consistent evaluation and consequences.

INGREDIENTS: Energy #6, Commitment Bioflavens, Enthusiasm Extract, Consistency, Visions of Greatness, Desire for Completion, Passion, Integrity and A Good Old Fashion Kick In the Ass.

"Poor Choice" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Little Devil Repellent and apply to any situation or person who promotes Little Devils. "Can't Get a Break" Strength: Combine two parts Little Devil Repellent with one part cold water and spray fog mist that engulfs the Little Devil. "Life Changing" Strength: Mix undiluted Little Devil Repellent with two table spoons of Dumb Ass Repellent and immerse the Little Devil with copious amounts of Little Devil Repellent. Repeat until desired result is achieved.

Warning: Little Devil Repellent may cause some to wince, scream, move about uncontrollably and loose bodily control. However, prolonged usage may result in significant behavioral modifications.

Note: For best results encourage the recipient and do not become a negative influence in their life. Remain firm, always searching for the moral high ground and act in love.

INGREDIENTS: 283 mg of Common Sense Multiplier, Three Tablespoons of Fortitude, Discernment Extract, Wonderful Friends Attractor, Passion, Self Forgiveness, Moral Steadfastness and Super Discipline Solution #22.

"Kissing" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Lust Repellent and apply fog mist to the boyfriend and yourself if needed. "Breaking Tan Lines" Strength: Combine two parts Lust Repellent with one part cold water and spray the "Affected" areas. "If You Love Me..." Strength: For maximum effect apply copious amounts of Lust Repellent to the "affected" areas. Then place the bottle between the knees and hold until the episode of lust is over.

Warning: Laboratory test have shown this product to cause shock and dismay to "Lusting" boyfriends. May be an irritant in some situations. After usage avoid being alone and seek well populated areas.

Note: Lifespray recommends establishing boundaries BEFORE dating. Do not date someone who does not actively pursue similar values and respect you the way they should. Learn to firmly say "NO!" and use foresight to avoid compromising situations.

INGREDIENTS: Lust Distracter #47, Episode of Temporary Impotence, Self Respect Extract, Thoughts of Baseball Solution, 2000 mg of Morality, Sacrificing Love, Consideration, Interruption Multiplier, and Visions of an Irate Parent.

Monster Repellent: Repels all monsters, dark shadows, under the bed creepy things, in the closet goullies, and outside goliaths.

Directions: Spray Monster Repellent in concerned areas before bed. Repellent is long lasting and lasts from sun down to sun up. Monster Repellent is also effective in daytime dark and creepy spaces. Perfect for nap time.

INGREDIENTS: sweet dreams extract, mom's love, super galactic monster dissolver, double strength creepy barrier and fantastical cosmic energizer.

Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part Mooch Repellent and spray any Mooch Request or transfer of responsibility from the Moocher. "Poor Me" Strength: Combine two parts Mooch Repellent with one part cold water and spray the Moocher. "Super Mooch" Strength: Mix undiluted Mooch Repellent with a firm "NO!" To increase effectiveness add two teaspoons of Lazy Ass Repellent to Mooch Repellent and shake - do not stir! For best results apply Mooch Repellent every two hours.

Note: Inform the Mooch that he or she needs to establish independence and begin to provide for their own needs. Such reoccurring requests for Money, Food, Transportation, Housing and other services strains the relationship and places an undue burden on the dispenser of the Mooch Repellent.

INGREDIENTS: Whining Dissolver #347, Anti Impulse Extract, Self Sufficient Accelerator, Job Desire Propellant, Acceptance of Responsibility, Responsibility Transference Dissolver and Old Fashioned Kick in the Ass.

Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part Mother-In-Law Repellent and spray to repel any unwanted involvement of a Mother-In-Law. "Butt Out" Strength: Combine two parts Mother-In-Law Repellent with one part cold water and spray the Mother. "Your Undermining Our Marriage" Strength: Mix undiluted Mother-In-Law Repellent with a backbone and tell her to stay out of your business. You and your wife can make your own decisions.

Warning!!! Laboratory tests of this product have demonstrated that its' use may result in gasps, shrills, flagellates, and frigid temperatures at future family events.

Note: Consider honest communication with your Mother-in-Law and politely, yet firmly, let her know that her intrusiveness undermines the marriage of the daughter she loves. Furthermore, as her husband and the father of your Mother-In-Law's grandchildren you cannot allow such behavior to continue.

INGREDIENTS: Activated Nosiness Dissolver, Intrusive Barrier #347, Butt-Out Blocker, Anti-Manipulation Solution, Change Accelerator, and Stool Softener.

Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part Mother-In-Law Repellent and spray to repel any unwanted involvement of a Mother-In-Law. "Butt Out" Strength: Combine two parts Mother-In-Law Repellent with one part cold water and spray the Mother. "Your Undermining Our Marriage" Strength: Mix undiluted Mother-In-Law Repellent with a backbone and tell her to stay out of your business. It's your life to live as you choose!

Warning!!! Laboratory tests of this product have demonstrated that its' use may result in gasps, shrills, flagellates, and frigid temperatures at future family events.

Note: Consider honest communication with your Mother-in-Law and politely, yet firmly, let her know that her intrusiveness undermines the marriage of the son she loves. Furthermore, as his wife and the mother of your Mother-In-Law's grandchildren you cannot allow such behavior to continue.

INGREDIENTS: Activated Nosiness Dissolver, Intrusive Barrier #347, Butt-Out Blocker, Anti-Manipulation Solution, Change Accelerator, Stool Softener and It's My Kitchen So No Bitchin' Extract.

"Mind Your Own Business" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Nosy Neighbor Repellent and apply to any situation or person who demonstrates Nosy behavior. "Butt Out" Strength: Combine two parts Nosy Neighbor Repellent with one part cold water and spray fog mist that engulfs the Nosy Neighbor. "Move to Beirut" Strength: Mix undiluted Nosy Neighbor Repellent with two tablespoons of Little Devil Repellent and immerse the Nosy Neighbor with copious amounts of Nosy Neighbor Repellent. Repeat until desired result is achieved.

Warning: This product has been known to cause exacerbation among Nosy Neighbors. Laboratory tests indicate this product may cause Nosy Neighbors may experience shortness of breath, rash, itching, and a prolonged bout with flagellants.

Note: For best results, respectfully yet firmly, communicate to your neighbor that while you appreciate their concern you and your family need space and freedom from outside influences.

INGREDIENTS: Buttinski Dissolver #427, Two Tablespoons of BS Repellent, Gossip Shield, 450 mg of Neighbor Occupier, Respect Extract, Electric Fence Simulator and Nose Tweaker Deluxe.

Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part P.M.S. Repellent and dispense from a protected location. "La Perra" Strength: Combine two parts P.M.S. Repellent with one part water and spray with protective "fog" pattern. "Pit Bull" Strength: Use undiluted P.M.S. Repellent and strike with a covert approach - remember to stay low!

Warning!!! Laboratory tests of this product have demonstrated that its use may result in a violent response from the recipient. (Nuclear Attack is Possible!!!!) The head has been known to spin in full rotations on the shoulders. It is highly recommended that the dispenser of this product strike quickly and then run like hell.

Note: For best results consider added patience and kindness with the P.M.S. person. Married Persons: Take extra measures to keep a clean house and deal with stresses associated with life and family. Non Married Persons: Be supportive and make an effort to do something special for the person under control of P.M.S.

INGREDIENTS: Vicious Attack Neutralizer, Anger Management Extract, Extreme Hormone Suppressant, 850 mg of Sanity Preservative, Touch of Empathy, Self Control and Self Restraint.

Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part Potty Mouth Repellent and spray any stream of Potty language, crude comment, vulgar saying or dirty comment. "Profanity" Strength: Combine two parts Potty Mouth Repellent with one part cold water and spray the Potty Mouth. "Never Again In My House" Strength: Mix undiluted Potty Mouth Repellent with a stern look and explanation that the preceding words are never o be uttered again in your presence. Repeat process with added sanctions as needed.

Note: Educate the recipient of Potty Mouth Repellent that potty language will eliminate all chances for personal and financial success in life. Furthermore, if one is to eliminate filth that comes from the mouth he or she must first eliminate the filth that enters the mind. Nothing comes out that is not already inside.

INGREDIENTS: Higher Standards Enhancer, Trash Warning Extract, Convictions, Goodness Seeking Bioflavens, Filth Repellent #9, Strength to Endure Temptation, Foul Mouth Dissolver and a Good Ol' Fashioned Spanking.

"Dukes of Hazard" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Red Neck Repellent and apply to the individual . "WWF" Strength: Combine two parts Red Neck Repellent with one part cold water and spray fog mist that engulfs the Red Neck. "He Haw" Strength: Mix undiluted Red Neck Repellent with two table spoons of Dumb Ass Repellent and apply repeatedly to the Red Neck until the desired change is experienced.

Warning: Once I.Q. Repellent is applied it must be used continually in order to prevent relapse. Indications of relapse include prolonged viewing of "He Haw", whistling Dixie and pronounced flirting with family members.

Note: Red Neck behavior is highly contagious and may tempt even the most sophisticated individuals to publicly expose hidden Red Neck tendencies. If fearful of such action user of product should first apply Red Neck Repellent to oneself.

INGREDIENTS: I.Q. Multiplier, 250 mg of Class and Sophistication, Backwoods Neutralizer, Common Sense Extract, Two Tablespoons of Dumb Ass Repellent, Gene Pool Expander, Inbreeded Barrier #71 and Two Mega doses of Elementary Education.

"Puffer" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Smoking Repellent and apply to the lit cigar or cigarette. "Chain Smoker" Strength: Combine two parts Smoking Repellent with one part cold water and spray fog mist that engulfs the smoker. "Hacking and Coughing" Strength: Mix undiluted Smoking Repellent with two table spoons of Dumb Ass Repellent and immerse the cigarette or cigar for at least twenty minutes.

Warning: Smoking Repellent may agitate the smoker. Apply Smoking Repellent only to the cigar or cigarette. Laboratory tests have shown smokers treated with Smoking Repellent may experience frustration and rectal discomfort.

Note: For best results do not encourage the smoker and do not model smoking behaviors - especially when young children are present. Most smokers will recoil upon ill received second hand smoke from the recipient.

INGREDIENTS: 250 mg of Smoking Consideration, Stogie Dissolver, Smoke Knock Down Solution #486, Super Potent Flame Extinguisher, One Tablespoon of Redneck Repellent, Tobacco Soaker and Crave Reverser Extract.

"Network" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Spin Repellent and apply fog mist to the spinner as needed. "Blog" Strength: Combine two parts Spin Repellent with one part cold water and spray the person who seeks to spin. "Pundit" Strength: For maximum effect apply copious amounts of Spin Repellent to the party guilty of engaging in Political Spin. Repeat process as needed.

Warning: Laboratory test have shown this product to cause shock and dismay to Political Spinsters. May be an irritant in most situations. After usage avoid being alone and seek well populated areas.

Note: Spraylife recommends applying Political Spin Repellent to all political arguments and ideologies from both sides of the isle. This product is especially effective in combatting political bias in the popular media. Political Spin Repellent is most effective when combined with well thought out logical arguments outlining your position and plan.

INGREDIENTS: Truth Distiller #71, Impatience With Spin, Concern for Truth Extract, Pundit Dissolver with Conscience Magnifier, Half Cup of B.S. Repellent and Arrogance Reducer.

Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part Temptation Repellent and spray the affected area. "Have to Have It" Strength: Combine two parts Temptation Repellent with one part water and spray with protective "fog" pattern. "Out of Control" Strength: Use undiluted Temptation Repellent and spray the tempter as well as the tempted. Consider "misting" yourself prior to anticipated contact with the Temptee and, or, Tempter.

Warning!!! Proper use of this product may have lasting effects on the recipient of Temptation Repellent and those around him or her. Happiness, and long lasting, deep relationships may develop. Overall quality of life will improve.

Note: Temptation Repellent is one of the only Repellent products designed for self use and use with others. Consider applying product to self anytime a menacing temptation may arise.

INGREDIENTS: Self Restraint, Control over emotions and actions, conviction of poor decisions, Materialism Neutralizer, Sexual Control Extract, Ethics 101 with Energizer and 348 mg of Protection 24.

"Distraction" Strength: Mix one part cold water with one part Wandering Eyes Repellent and apply to the individual. "Gawking" Strength: Combine two parts Wandering Eyes Repellent with one part cold water and spray fog mist to engulf the gawker. "Pervert" Strength: Mix undiluted Wandering Eyes Repellent with 2 tablespoons of Dumbass Repellent and spray. Repeat process until desired results are achieved.

Warning: In extreme situations consider applying Wandering Eyes Repellent to the groin area of the Gawker. Be sure to utilize the "Straight Stream" setting on the nozzle so you can spray from a safe distance. Apply Wandering Eyes Repellent from Spraylife.com until desired result is achieved.

Note: For best results consider wearing clothes that are not revealing or form fitting. Crossing your arms or holding a folder against your chest may also block the view. Kneed down instead of bending over to pick something up from the floor.

INGREDIENTS: Wonder Bra Neutralizer, Eye Control Extract, Breast Blurring Agent, Hormone Dissolver #67, Testosterone Reducer 2500mg. , Cup Size Confuser, Thoughts of Your Sister, Mental Images of Old Ladies with Tattoos on Motorcycles.

Regular Strength: Mix one part water with one part Whining Repellent and spray any complaint, criticism and "poor me" diatribe. "Poor Me" Strength: Combine two parts Whining Repellent with one part cold water and spray the Whiner. "Get to Work" Strength: Mix undiluted Whining Repellent with an explanation that the purpose of any job is to solve problems. Whining Repellent is perfect for individuals, employees, groups, students and kids. For increased results combine with Lazy Ass Repellent.

Note: Remind the Whiner that if you fix the problem then they will no longer be needed. Yes, part of work is work!

INGREDIENTS: Whining Solution #12, Complaint Dissolver, 250 mg of Dumb Ass Repellent, Fix It Yourself Encourager and Figure It Out Extract.

"Low Blow" Strength: Mix one part water with one part Wise Ass Repellent and apply to the individual . "Insulting Comment" Strength: Combine two parts Wise Ass Repellent with one part cold water and spray fog mist that engulfs the Wise Ass. "Pain In the Ass" Strength: Mix undiluted Wise Ass Repellent with two table spoons of Dumb Ass Repellent and apply repeatedly to the Wise Ass.

Warning: Apply liberal amounts of Wise Ass Repellent to the purveyor of Wise Ass comments. Prolonged use of Wise Ass Repellent to a single subject way result in a "Wet" Wise Ass. Upon such circumstances towel off the Wise Ass prior to further application of Wise Ass Repellent.

Note: For best results do not encourage the Wise Ass and do not model Wise Ass behaviors - especially when young children are present. Most Wise Ass people will recoil upon ill received comments that are not well received by the recipient.

INGREDIENTS: Full Slice of Humble Pie, Lobotomy Simulator # 36, Speech Inhibitor, 250 mg of Empathy Extract, 1 Tablespoon of Potty Mouth Repellent, Pride Dissolver and a Symbolic Smack Upside the Head.